Clip to see

View this clip and you may want to put to stand by tissues.
So prepared to be amazed and touched.

This is my only word - REINCARNATION.

Believe it or not.

:))

Love like this/Random

He: I guess no one has ever love you the way i do
She: But i don't know how much you love me... it all depends on how you show it.
He: I need time to get use to this. If you were the guy, you'd act the same way i did.
She: Well, i guess. But i still felt hurt at how your action made me felt.
He: I didn't mean it that way... But no matter what i don't think we'll ever break. I love you lots.
She: You're confident... Well I hope we don't. I love you too...

It all continues and they talked things out like they always do.
This time however, it's mixed with love and frustration... but still, they managed to fight it off.
I guess trust do seem hard to be given. No matter how much easy it seems to others.
But in reality, it never is. There is always that negative part that forms in our head.
We can't run away from those thoughts because it is usually instinctive. Only logic will let us be positive and thus gives us the comfort that we seek.
However, not all of us uses logic moderately. Sometimes we tend to be in denial and we use logic to maintain living in denial.
Therefore, we let ourselves make believe. Or shall i say, cheated?
No one can ever predict if we'll be faithful or our partners will be.
Only time will tell and only love will rescue whatever that remains.


This is my view.

Today i felt too sick to work. Had to leave early...
I had my sleep since i got back only waking at 9plus just now.
I had my meal and have decided to check out which class I'm posted at.
I have three people in my class that I'm acquainted to - Josh. Ben. Edith.
The class ain't so bad after all. I'm in W64P and Shenath is in W64D.
That isn't so bad after all :)

Anyway, i can't wait for my work break! yipee!
1-6 april... i hope i will get enough rest.
I realize that my money is again, running out... (why ain't i surprise)
Well, fashion week is forthcoming. I would love to be spotted trendy by fashion police if ever i visit town next week.
And i hope i wont get arrested if there will be any :D

Okay now, i have to go. Flu is getting worst again.
So before i sneeze my laptop away, i better take my leave.

Good nights!
Sweetest Dreams!

Sometimes

There are times i wonder how things could revert so sudden,
At the moment i felt so happy
And then the next would make me feel empty,
I cant understand why do things have to be like that...

Sometimes i wonder why you see me like that,
Sometimes i feel flattered but at times i feel trap
How can i be honest if honesty is not appreciated
But usually it's not like that, cos i know you want honesty...

The night got me thinking how horrible things can be,
The night stirred up thoughts and makes me wonder
I feel the need to tell how i feel
But will you be open?

..............................................................................................................

Dear Lord,

each time i pray that i will be good to your child,
to make up for my unfaithful ways to another one before
i promised you that i will give my best to this child of yours
and so far i know Im fulfilling it...

but i pray that this child of yours be more understanding.
to understand that the last thing i will do is to be with another guy.
to understand that i am not so easy...
to understand that i love only him

i dont understand why i feel that i am seen so easy...
or is this just another thoughts i have when i think too much.
but thats what i feel and i cant take that anymore....

Random

I was thinking today about a lot of things.

1. One week free of work/school! (April 1-6)
2. Shenath
3. My relationship with Mum


Work is really getting on my last nerve. (Cant live with it, cant live without it!)
As do all of us working class people :)

How we wish to be born like the filthy rich and not having to think about the major problem of everyone - MONEY.
Too little of it and we humans go crazy.
Then again, too much of it can also drive us to insanity.
So what do we do?

Just pray that we will have enough to survive this material world of ours

But what is ENOUGH? How much is ENOUGH?
Thats the questions that we can never have a straight answer to...

Okay lets change the subject.


Shenath has been working a lot these days and so have i.
As he have put it we do lack communications lately, i do agree definitely.
And i am just thankful that he can feel it. I feel so loved.
Compatibility really has taken us to what we are sharing now.
We are only 8 months old and yet, i have hopes to be with him... until death do us part.
I feel his sincerity but it's still early to say.

I am happy i must say.
Happy to be with him.
I didn't know that i can find a love like this.
And i guess it really is love, because this is different from the "love" i felt before.

I am most happy too because my relationship with mum is great.
I cannot imagine that we can be this "mother-daughterly" close.
Then again, i hope this last :)
(THANKS GOD)

Happiness is always around i guess.
We just need to see it and embrace the opportunity to be happy :)
One advise: Be positive no matter how negative life will be.

And so just to end today's entry... here are some pictures to look see.

First Post

Dear All,

Welcome to my new blog.
To those who know about my other blog, feel free to experience a different view of me.
I do feel that I am a little bit more mature this time.
I have learned a lot from the many months of absence from blogging.
I didn't blog events even though i feel that it is worth the read, because i appreciate privacy now.
I am a little bit off the gossip world - i guess i realize that it is never a nice thing.
I'm stressing that whatever remark i make is the truth - at least to my point of view.


I am back to blogging because i feel that it is my passion to write and it is just a bonus for people to bother reading what i write.
However, i may not keep up wonderful entries because i am not exactly an aspiring writer.
I just write according to my mood :)
So always be patient and open about what i write in this blog.
I appreciate openness.
Also, i do not need any sort of comment so as you can see, there is no chat box or comments section for this current blog.

Thank you in advance for those who will follow my entries.

Yours truly,
M. Jean

Two and a half months of school break will be over in two weeks.
I am anticipating the one week break that i will have; away from school and away from work.
I thought that i will be able to rest well in the Philippines. I thought that i can rejuvenate from the hectic lifestyle of Singapore.
I thought that i can be surrounded by wonderful things and loving relatives.
I thought that it would be great that i am away from my parents.
Then when i experienced it there with my relatives, i was wrong! DEAD WRONG.

Apparently, the one person that i want to run away from proves to be the one in the family that i should never be without.
I never would have thought that i will only have her as my savior when i was in need.
I never thought that she will be the only one who can really understand me.
That person is no other than my MOTHER.
In the whole Bautista clan, only my mother has proven capable of being there for me.

Outside the clan, my dear bf also prove to be one that is always around for me.
Compare to my clan, my bf is better in terms of love.
It saddens me but i have to live by it.
I have to bury that hurt because it is useless to mope about it.
I am thankful to GOD that i have quite a number of people that i can still rely on.
These people are my mother, papa, ana, isaac, shenath and last but not least, my dad.
My friends are there to give a listening ears of course.
Currently and as most of the time, Nurul tops that list.

After my trip from my homeland, i continue my work for Patterns Concept at Takashimaya.
New York Runway Sales - where they sell clothes that i wont even buy from.
The dresses and the labels are very much appealing but not the price.
Especially for a teen/student like me whose pocket money is usually spent on hp bills and other IMPORTANT stuff.
I am looking at this particular kimono sleeve bronze dress going at $194.50 (after 50% discount)
But the sale will be over way before i get my pay!
Talk about bad timing...

Anyway, I'm anticipating my work/school break of one week.
School starts the week after next and I wont deny that i am excited about it :)

Well, Shenath and i are going along great. But of course we do have our tiff here and there.
That is inevitable with couples - especially nowadays when we are lacking communications.
Our schedule don't match much but that wont ruin us, we are sure :)

There are also the week that we can spend our time making us strong.
Also, I'm spending that free time for my friends.
I met Hidayah and Jaja today after work - it was quite crazy and of course very tiring.
But it was nice seeing us three together, not frequently seeing each other but still close.
I guess i will always have to put aside time for my friends too. They are quite important as i have realized.
However, i must say that i will have to invest more time with my boyfriend, especially after realizing that he has the potential to be my future...

I guess the future is very much unpredictable.
There are a lot of things that we can plan but only fate will decide what happens.
And fate works the most unpredictable predictable way.. (if u get what i mean)
But as long as you can help it, always hold on to what you plan to do for your life.
For me, I'm building myself for the future that i hope will be for me.

So for now, good night.