words

faith wearing thin and there's nothing much to be done to the step that i have taken.
i cannot accept the fact that what im feeling now will be what leads me to an insane dilemma.
i hate to admit the fact that i am really liking someone so much...
and it hurts to think that it will all be over due to my stupidity.
i hate to admit it over and over again to myself that i did a foolish mistake.
that once again im going to have to try to psycho myself from liking someone...
i feel strongly for hIM but i have to admit the fact that fg has really distracted me from hIM.
fg is really a good distraction. i really have to admit that.
im really being a wonderful bee yotch really.
but how do i move away from fg and then reassure hIM that i want him instead...
or have i lost him already? i have no clue... arrrggg..
this whole situation really makes me truly in touch with how guys feel.
the things that i do to them, hIM make me realise how stupid i can really be.
hIM makes me realise what kind of mistake there is on how i treat those guys i have dated.
hIM shows me myself. hIM is like my mirror... is that hIM's purpose of entering my life?
REVELATION? is that it? then fuk that ... ! i have finally find someone who i wanna be with and now, it has made stuck in this pit of insane dilemma. im not even sure if what i feel is really what is meant to be. fg is really a wonderful person. i must admit.
but how do i weigh my emotion and decide.
GOD give me light...
my motives and purpose now is my ways before. i am not a serial dater. i never was.
i was the one who commits dutifuly to my other half.... i never ever want to hurt him and whoever is special to me.
but now? i land myself in this stupid moment. im even ashame to say that i am what i am now.
arrrggghh!!


i hope it isnt too late to alter the things that has happened.
pls forgive me... i have been wrong to do what i did...