Quote of the Day

"Who shall say that the maiden so pretty and fair shall always have the greater man; and the ogre who walks to the beat of thundering clouds will never find her prince?" - Unknown

What Way He Makes Me Feel

Okay, like seriously.

All the suppressing of emotion I been doing so that I won't fall for him, is making me more fall for him.
I can't stand it. It's like every bit of molecules in my body, mind and soul yearns for him!

Just a mere sight, slight touch and just being around him makes me feel really good. I don't think I felt this way before ever. It's like the type of innocent, school girl emotion that envelopes me in a warm cocoon.

Yikes, see even my poetic nature comes out at the thought of him!

I have to head to bed now. I don't know how long I can take it without giving in to my feelings. But I pray to the Lord that He will deliver me from this or deliver me to him. Heh.

Alright, good night everyone!

Unconditional Love

Courtesy of God Wants You To Know facebook application

Sometimes, it gets too beautiful that I wonder how such an app can produce such affirmative and encouraging words. It's like as if God used this tool to reach out to internet demographics like me.

We usually forget the awesome love of God, and so I'm grateful how such application as this can be a form of reminder how His love is so unconditional.

I couldn't agree more.

There are more beautiful messages I have received that inspired and affirmed me, but let me start with this post.

More to come. Especially the recent update on the Sunday wedding that just passed. The first wedding that I organized :)

It was really enjoyable. More to come, more indeed.

For now, I need to catch my train to slumberland. Ciaos.

Weeeeekeeeeend

Usually I try to make it a habit to sleep in during the weekends, but as the months of late, I haven't been able to get what I wanted. There's always appointments and such.

Today, I bet it'll be fun :)

I'm going for a wedding rehearsal! It's a day I get to see the entire bridal party and of course, being the coordinator of the special day, I'm hoping to see the decor team the couple contracted for their matrimonial and reception.

November is here and it's soon going. I can feel the quick advancement of time to 2012 already! Yikes. And knowing December, it will fly past quicker than it came.

If you all can remember my last post, it was just a month back I semi-coordinated, and was the emcee for Jasmine and Neil's wedding. Now, I've Eldrid and Ninik's to get hyped up to again going to be doing three job scope - I'm the coordinator, the emcee and yes, one of the bridesmaid! :) (May God continue to sustain me and help me)

But honestly, I can't complain. I thoroughly enjoy the preparation because I'm not alone to do so. I've the music ministry member to help :) They've been awesome and really helpful.

Anyway, you know what they say about the time you attend one friend's wedding. You'd be invited to more and then either you will be next or never at all. Lol

My parents, as it seem wants me to be serious and take things seriously regarding getting married. At least to think about getting married in the coming years. Then again, it's not easy to decide and it will not be my decision of I do get married. I have left it to Him. He shall decide what is best for me. Yes, I will offer up my desires (which I am still rather shaky in), but it comes to the point where i'd rather be with Him than with anyone else. Unless, He finds me someone who can honour my relationship with Him.

From Nov 2011 - Feb 2012, I have this calling to discernment for my vocation. I need to know and seek His Will regarding the path I am to take. 2012 is just around the corner, and there are a lot of life events to happen and to anticipate. 

So my first step to discernment is tomorrow's day of prayer with the Franciscan sisters at the St. Francis Convent at Thomson Rd. I'm really blessed to be asked to join them to listen to God's will to discern for what He wants of me.

I know my parents want me to get married and all, but somehow, I want to experience these before I get to the point of just going for one option of marriage. I like to have the option that is wonderfully fitted to me.

A number of my friend's ask then how about the love interest. I say, I let it be. I do like him a lot but I cannot show him how I feel at the moment. 

1. I'm scared because to me, he's not just any other guy I've known and dated 

2. It's better to be friends till I know my vocation 

3. I want to be affirmed by God that I do indeed like him and He's the one worth getting 'hurt' for.

You know what they say, you cannot escape hurt and pain in any relationship. It's just a matter if the person is worth it to be in pain while in the relationship, because it's better than being in pain while no longer with the person. One way or another, God leads us to what He has made us here on Earth for.

There are many more to consider in this life. And I want to be sure that whatever choice I make, it will be God-centric. I have led my life and love not following is statutes, His ways, and His teachings. It led me nowhere but to hurt, pain and sinful deeds. So now, I believe I am now aware of what needs to be done when choosing a life partner, or a life direction.

For now, if my love interest is reading this - if it is God's will, mountains will move just so I will be with you. At the mean time, even if you're unsure if it's even you who I really like, It's okay. It's best to know it at the appointed time, if it is His will. Or as I believe, because of my strong feeling against showing you or telling you anything, if it is His will, He might just be the one to tell you and affirm to you that yes, I really do like you :)

Before I end off, I would like to share with you all a prayer that I found most useful.

Power of Eyes

"The Eye is the Window of the Soul."

We have been told far too much times. I understood its power today.

It's been a long time I maintained an eye contact with anyone.

Eye contact that didn't invoke unwanted vibes, but more to make a concrete assurance that indeed there is something within. I'm more than sure that he is aware of what he was doing. And upon the realization of what he does, I could feel my face burns and heart smiles.

I also believed now of John 15:7 

"If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given you."

I am happy at the events of my life at the moment. And although it is nothing like I've experienced before, I am taking this as a start of a new path to loving. This may not be the one I'm settling for life, but it gives me a new perspective on why patience is a virtue and why love is simple.

Source: www.directdaniel.blogspot.com

It's a beautiful feeling to be able to look into the eyes of another person comfortably, and not afraid of seeing something within that is undesirable.

This is our eyes agreeing.

Source: www.eyedoctor.homestead.com/BodyLanguage.html

No, I'm not in love. Yet.

Little Things Go A Long Way With Me

Source: www.kikki-k.com

Being a girl, it's typical to be hearing the term, "it's the small thing that matters", "a little goes a long way" and so forth. (However, of course I'm not fully claiming that only women think of these.)

Personally, I really am a sucker for the small things that a guy can do. I'm very observant, even to the fault that I notice the small details that either makes or break a man in my eyes. However, learning more I let a man be a man and accept that they're really just not going to think like us girls. The only way we can get a man do what we want is to be firm and tell them exactly what we want. Instead of beating about the bush, and getting nowhere but to frustration, we women need to be sure of what we need and want.

I'm not one to say about telling exactly what I want at the moment as I'm in my deciding phase. I know what I desire and who is it, so far I'm enjoying the currents of lovely feeling I'm feeling now.

Euphoric. Exotic. Wow.

To me, small things do matter... Tremendously. It's like the image I selected as feature image, the formation of romance can be compared to that of a puzzle. Each pieces created and moulded by the man and the woman, it is meant to fit to form a healthy loving heart. Otherwise, that means that if the pieces doesn't fit, either the puzzle piece isn't meant for that part we are trying to fit it in, or it may even be that the puzzle pieces that we are trying to fit doesn't belong to that particular puzzle at all.

There are many things to take as a reason for why relationship doesn't work, but I'm not to use any to give me the reason to give up on love.

I'm not in love now, but I'm close.


And each day, I look forward to you.

XOXO

Tell Him?

Celine Dion & Barbara Streisand - Tell Him
Album : Let's Talk About Love

I been switching between Celine and Barbara.

I can't let him pass me by, but somehow, I'm struggling to keep this overwhelming and overflowing emotions. I'm committing it all now to divine intervention. I never really felt this way before. It's like something different a way towards this path I seem to be taking. It's something to really think about when the reward is proportional to the effort required, and the effort is proportional to the worth of the reward I can feel to come if I let my feelings show, if just a little bit, I let someone in.

Lately, I've been very careful.

I want to get it right already. No more fooling around, no more games and puppy loves. Maybe indeed, as to what Best and my other girls say, just "Tell Him".

Hey You

Each time you are close, my heart beat like drums on a roll.

When I look into your eyes, I feel electrocuted, I feel surges of lighting bolts.

I suppress my emotions but I wonder how far do you know my feelings.

I'm the Great Pretender, pretending I don't feel you, pretending your eyes doesn't pierce me.

How then can I ever let it show when I don't even want to come out of my cave?

I look for something that perhaps this little "thing" might not survive through anything at all.

I want to see you each day and in each day, I wish it is you.

For now I'm letting time take me to where God wills it to be.

L*** IS IN THE AIR?

Ronan Keating's It's the Way You Make Me Feel

It's just how I'm feeling now :) Ugh I don't like this school-girl feeling BUT I can't help it anymore! LOL

*Giggles inside* 

Ways to Love

EASY TO SAY, DIFFICULT TO DO

But nevertheless, this ways must be sowed. It's not impossible when we do our best, and let God do the rest. Yet another challenge to myself? And of course, to you all too. Good luck!

WEDDINGS, WEDDINGS, WEDDINGS

One of my recent pics at my friends' wedding. 

My first time as wedding emcee :)

Ever since I had the change in position and work nature, I found it harder to breathe each day.
It's a good problem, seeing how much enquiries and sales I been able to do, THANK GOD. Apart from that, there's never a quiet time for me at work. From the early morning of my arrival at work, to the very end of the day that extends to 7pm or 8pm at night, I still find myself filled up to the brim.

The only thing that comforts me is the divinity of the day. It is also when I'm able to just stop everything I'm supposed to be doing, let go and not be so much of a perfectionist by doing everyday in ONE day. I always have this divine grace I always thankfully receive that gives me comfort and push each time I feel weary and down due to tiredness.

There are many things I love to forward to God of my gratefulness, but it can never be enough. It's like the thank-you notes will just pile up and I will still have a lot of thanking.

Lately, I realize that it's been long since I praised Him. It's been long since I entered a sabbath. And it's been long since I longed for nothing except Him. I don't know how long this spiritual dry spell will last but in any case, I continue to trust in Him. And so should anyone too.

Recently at a talk by Frankie Yee, I learned that faith and trust are two different things. He said that faith can vary through circumstances, but trust remains the same (or so it should be). It's the trust that matters which goes a long way in instilling in us the wonderful things that the love of God can bring. (Ahhh... Just lovely)

Anyway, my weekends lately have been something I truly look forward to. That is of course because I get to do a teeny-bit of what I need to do, spend time with my family, and friends. Lately, like last week, I spent Friday and Sunday with my church friends planning the entertainment of our friend, Eldrid and Ninik's wedding. I'm the official organizer for their wedding. (So honoured! Now, I've to find another pink dress. Hehe another excuse to shop!)

The not-yet-ready pre-nup pics of E&N

Jasmine and Neil's wedding was just awesome. I felt so emotional for them, I was moved to tears of joy watching them be joined as one. I was their 'unofficial' coordinator for their Holy Matrimony. I didn't really get a full view of their wedding as they take their vow because I was manning the entrance for late-comers etc. But it was a good practice for me as bridal entourage took the queue from me when they are going to march in, and the running of the wedding is now rather familiar for me. Jasmine and Neil's wedding has equipped me with what i need to know about wedding masses. (Here are some nice photographs of the wedding by Yeow Ming, Blessed-i Photography)

Weddings weddings weddings... next will be my galfriend, Jar's engagement on Feb 12, 2012. Time is soo fast. We're all excited for my gal. We never thought that it would be this soon. I was suppose to be helping to plan but due to my work demand and the other weddings coming up, I'm taking the very back seat. She's rather understanding because this is just her engagement. But soon in November, if I don't start helping, she'll be killing me soon after. Hehe :)

EXCITED!

Education

I've a lot of mind in education at the moment. My thoughts go out to empower myself via education. I am very interested to enter a degree program in a double major in marketing and pyschology. However, i feel that it's not the time yet as i'm sending my cousins to polytechnic first.

My yet another recent pay increase will not suffice for a $40, 000 loan, and besides i don't not wish to even borrow $40, 000 unnecessarily. Realistically, my goal is to send my very close-knitted cousins to school in the April 2012 intake. They're here now sending applications, and it's one of my milestones in life to have brought them here, with my grandfather. It's a beautiful to reach a step in the ladder of accomplishment, in fulfilling of my promises to granny. However, it's not done yet. They've yet to be accepted in the polytechnics and to enrol proper.

They will have to return back to Philippines again in the coming month, spend their Christmas there and then come back here by February. It may seem a lot of expenses, but really, I'm a testimony on how God really provides. He continues to sustain me, and surprisingly, i'm still even able to have my personal expenses on track. Thank God!

I've also reached a milestone in my career front. I hope that our move to the new place will invigorate my mind and spark my focus on my sales function being transferred to the sales dept for media and entertainment division. I'm appointed now as the Adobe product champ... err like a product line manager (though of course, i'm not in managerial position). My jobs is to ensure the quota quarterly and achieve the minimum annual quota set by Adobe. I'm excited! Anyway, going back on education....

It is still important no matter how much the amount. Yet, another calling for a different type of education resounds loud lately. I stumbled upon this course; Diploma in Faith Formation.

I been slowly but steadily learning more and more about the faith, and indeed, i get thirsty each time i immerse myself in the faith. It's a different route altogether. I am discerning on this, and I've till end of Nov to enrol. What shall i do?

I look forward to your continuous support dear friends. And the final support I hope to gain is our Parish Priest's recommendation, as it is required for the application. 

Hmmm, discernment in progress for now.

Much Love,

MJ

Weekend Stories?

Good midnight peeps!
Had a tiring but awesome weekend that just passed, and I'm still feeling very much lethargic due to it.
For the past two weeks I've not been sleeping before 11pm, as to what I desired so that I'm always up and about at work, rather than become a dead man walking.

Anyway, I don't wish to share the past weeks of my owl lifestyle lately. It's nothing much to come to think about it. I just cannot avoid coming home late from work, especially at the amount of work that I do at the moment. I'm just dying to hand over my marketing job functions ASAP so I need not worry about those.

Okay let's cover the past weekend.

Saturday, 1st Oct 2011, marked that special day for our youth group coordinators, Jasmine and Neil. They've been a source of inspiration to me regarding the existence of the real unconditional love. And the exact meaning of honouring each other, following through the faithfulness they have to God. They are simple beautiful.
They tie the knot in the morning of the mentioned date and everything just went spectacular. The wedding mass followed a small brunch for those who attended the wedding mass. There are many of us who were invited for the wedding lunch banquet at Grand Park Hotel at City Hall. I was their wedding emcee, paired with Ranson as we co-host the wedding event of the year for our ministry.

This is the first ever wedding that I hosted, and I'm glad having gotten this experience. This year, I hosted a Chinese New Year party for about 30-40 attendees, a feast day that saw thousands of parishioners, a first-year birthday party and now my first wedding event! It was fun :)

So far, I'm thankful that I was guided well by God in how I am to use these talents He so openly and generously blessed me with. I was able to move people, getting them to enjoy themselves and surprisingly, I make them laugh too. HONESTLY, I'M NOT A FUNNY PERSON.

I'm still waiting for the upload of the wedding photographers of my other pictures which they so freely took of me being the host. Our table is always visited by paparazzi being it the table where the wedding couple's close friends are. The above picture is about the only picture I have of myself. Sad for a camwhore like me.

I really enjoyed being with lovely people who motivates me and allows me to flourish in what I'm good at doing. It's the constant openness and acceptance of each other that allows the healthy movement of growth.

Moving away from the weekend, I'm psyche about moving to the new office building! We are moving on Wednesday officially. Yet all of us have done our packings accordingly already. So it's as good as us moving tomorrow! Hehe I'm kinda excited but of course, the change in my position is also one thing to take note. It will demand more of my time and such. In any case, I hope that everything will be smooth sailing.

Jia you!

Loves,

MJ

Video Updates

Alright, my voice was really gone here but nevertheless just to share the good times :)



This is at Daranak falls where we went to for a weekend trip during the 10 days holiday I had in Philippines. Will upload the videos taken at Intramorus in a few days, and perhaps during my Batam trip too. Suddenly love and appreciate YouTube. Hmmm

Okay anyway, today I just posted a video on my youtube channel my cousin, Michael's keyboarding stuff.
I'm amazed because he's didn't know how to play the keyboard before this. And in one day, he was able to start on Let It Be, and then Parting Times, followed by the wedding entrance song? Idk what is that called. But in any case, there's really beauty in music despite me not knowing it, I thank God i'm still able to appreciate it :)

Indeed, God gives people different talents accordingly :)

So now, Michael can play guitar (lead / base), basic drums, and now keyboard. Now it to get him to be exposed and sharpen this gift.




Cheers! :)

Major Updates

Welcome me back dear readers! :)

Wow, my 3 month hiatus was worth it. So many things to update, so many new things that happened! The only part I don't like is to recount the entire 3 months of my disappearance. And since so many thing has occurred, there bound to be tons of update and so this post will take a long time to type, and for you, to read. Therefore, I decided to do a summary instead! Covering only the major highlights of the events that has passed.

The last post was my sister, Ana's birthday party. So then the next event would be my birthday on the 23rd August 2011, where I held a "private" affair that ended up still being circulated in FB with pictures of the activity and the fun of it all. However, before I recount that, I have to go in order. So the next highlight would be the Philippines trip from Aug 11 to 21 :)

Aunt Rennie and Laura <3

Roy with hair, before his major make over. haha

So over the clouds and with some wonderful friends, off we travel towards my homeland, Philippines.

We took the most affordable airline, Tiger Airways, which I paid only at $150 (to and fro), where my friends paid a little bit more, with the maximum at $200+.

Then we landed at Diosdado Macapagal Airport (Clarke), Pampanga, Philippines.

The first food we had was Baliwag. Awesome chicken. Yum yum.

Then the day after, we rose early for church trip. We never really know that it would turn out so awesome.

We visited;

1. Antipolo Church

2. Sto. Domingo
3. Black Nazarene, Qiapo
4. The Cathedral in Intramuros

The place of Intramouros was were it was all educational and we really learned a lot. We rode a horse-carriage and the guide told us about the place pre, during and post war. We heard how the Chinese nationals were enslaved and mistreated by the Spanish coloniser. It was a sad story, but in the end everyone, both Filipino and Chinese nationals fought their way back to freedom. How beautiful, the story of courage and love for country.

Intramuros housed all the good schools, the historical sites and more. The Catholic Cathedral stood elegant and against all odds continue to be the central hope for the faith of all Filipinos.

We got back so late that night, and then after which we had a good time at night with everyone. We headed to Tip Top, a private area that has lost its people due to other of others that sprung up over the years in other places. Therefore, that night it was only my family that was there. We sung songs via the karaoke machines and then danced as to how we liked it. We enjoyed being alone in that private club because they'd never dance as we all did if there were other people around :)

The following days we spend was at Daranak and Batlag Waterfalls were we rough it out and we enjoyed the open sky. The tents and the wooden cottage failed us completely so all 20 (or so) of us roughed it out and slept in the open cottages, listening to the sound of the waterfalls. There were other groups there, and of course a horse that accompanied us through the night.

 

 

Yes, we all slept in this type of open cottage!

This weekend trip to Daranak / Batlag falls was because of the message that I had in my heart that Lola want us to commemorate her by. This time at Daranak is something emotional for me somehow as this was the last place we all convened as a family, gathered and had fun. We were complete at that time with her around. So the night itself at around 9++, the time she passed on, we all came together in one of the cottages and then offered up some nice words and prayers which I was asked to lead in. I thank God for the opportunity.

The following days we prepared for the upcoming solemn celebration of lola on 16th August 2011, to remember her death. We looked as it as her 1st year in heaven. We had a good round of praise and worship session, good talks and of course food and such during that day which I am privileged to lead in.

So the next few days we headed to Manila East resort at Taytay Rizal. After which, we got ready to head home. Got together for drinks and more drinks and then... the cigarettes were just soooo cheap we all had a fiesta of beer, ciggs and nice talkings.

We got back on Sunday morning with Lolo and the two cousins, Carissa and Michael. They will be here to study but because the intake hasn't started they're here on visit pass. We hope they can stay till like next year, but i doubt ICA will understand that despite being cousins, these two are like my siblings already. Well, anyway, we are all good :)

So far, i really believe that God provides, From Aug 21st till now, He continues to provides for my needs to provide for the new additions of family members at home. Also, as i prepare my finance to send my cousins to polytechnic here, He continues to give me opportunities and I'm glad that there will be changes in my job front :)

There's more to say and all, but this post will stop here. I'm excited to tell you all more about my special someone <3

Updates

It has been awhile since I posted an entry. I have been busy so much things these few days, and there are more to come when I think about it. It almost as always seem to feel that 7 days a week is never enough.

I've got so many things going on that I tend to question sometimes if I'm able to achieve the week's schedule. How will I catch up when I leave for Phil next month.

Anyway, back a bit. Just this week my sister turned 12 and we had a mini celebration (as it always end up becoming). I praise God for the way everything went. I actually made her a birthday card invitation that made its way to my design portfolio :)

This time I contribute a bit more, I took leave and did what I can to help out and provide. I'm happy with myself but I'm happier when she told me that she was really happy and enjoyed herself.




I got her a professionally-baked cake from one of my contacts. Got to know her from the PRE at my parish. It's really nice!!! Even dad who don't appreciate chocolate cake came for second round :)











The food is unquestionably awesome! Oh yes, I this year the special thing about her birthday is that she got herself good blessings the day before from Fr Ed as she requested to attend mass :)

I think it's beautiful, I hope to attend mass on my birthday this coming month too. However, I will be working on this day tho, but I'm going to throw a bash :)

I've to plan soon, looking for an alternative because apparently the SAF seaview chalets are fully booked and Chevys only have Sundays for bday function. I might need to find another alternative.

But in my current sched now it's a miracle I hardly find the time to even plan for the itenerary for Philly, esp granny's program, and then the beach getaway.

I get emotional lately.. Too emotional in fact, when I think of granny. She's really gone. Sigh.

*One day, I shall see you again. *

~ Posted by MJ thru BlogPress by iPhone

Day out with the Siblings

It's almost a week since I had the chance to see my siblings. So here we are at Tampines Mall playground...




After watching an awesome funny show, Mr Popper's Penguins



It is awesome! Jim Carey is a great comedian, keeps all of us entertained and really hooked on the movie. He has such a candid personality that will keep you wondering what else to expect from him.

Glad Ana and Zak had a good time. It's time to get home now.

Toodles with love for now =)

~ Posted by MJ thru BlogPress by iPhone

My First Ladies' Night since FOREVER

It was my very first 'ladies night' since forever. I usually CANNOT be bothered to go out on a weekday but today Marilyn and I went out for a dinner date with Marvin, one of our cell friend whom we have not seen for ages. He's been busy with work (and perhaps play), but we are glad he's able to join us for a bit of a chill-out.

I introduced them to Nabins @ Sultan Gate.

Source (Click Here)

We had a great talk about EVERYTHING. Teasing especially on the hot topic on interests of Marilyn :)

It's really nice to get to know church friends in the most secular way possible. Away from the holy zone of the church, we get to know just how we all are able to open about our thoughts and views.

It's a wonderful wake up call and something to learn from. Marvin was really insightful in what he shared with us. It has been great food for thought the whole night today. And it's 12.45am, but here i am typing away when i've to wake up at 7am, 6hours later.

Lately, I have been sleeping late. Since Monday that is, but it has been good overall.

On Monday, I enjoyed the Holy Hour with Dapheni, Ninik, Susana, Ranson, Alex and Tim. It is a form of prayer that we enjoy the presence of God in the exposure of the Blessed Sacrament held up by the monstrance.

Source (Click Here)

We prayed before the Blessed Sacrament with regards to our vocations. At least that is what I think Fr. Albert wanted us to do. This month's holy hour topic was with regards to life pursuits. So therefore, we examine what is it that we are indeed looking for. What are we called to do? Marriage or the life of the Religious. I discerned with regards to my job, and also of course my desire to serve, and how is the best way i should do it - with a man He chose to serve beside me or to chose the Great "I AM" who created man? 

We'll see in the months or years to come :)

Yesterday night, I attended mass for the Charismatic Prayer Community 9th Anniversary Mass. I was the lector for the reading yesterday. It was a beautiful experience to be there.

Tomorrow will be a long day for me as I am expecting a LONG LONG meeting at Church on PRE Evaluation & Committee meeting.

So anyway, i shall bid you all adieu for now. Have a great rest ahead! :)

My Busy Weekend

1. AEC div event 2011 on 1st July 2011





2. PRE June/ July 2011 - 30 Jun - 3 July 2011 batch




Children from the children corner for the 4 day event. My brother and sister are there too! :)




Zak and his new friend :)




My weekend this week has been a busy one and yet it was fulfilling. For the whole 4 days I was supporting the PRE in the powerhouse, praying at each sessions. I completed 6 full session, 3 partial session, 1 session I missed out cos I watched Transformers with Ignite!

Honestly, the constant prayers has been very enriching. I get a feel of what I will be doing in my years to come if I enter the convent or joined a form of sisterhood. For now, I'm discerning still :)

Haha let's see. It's not easy you know, but it was worth it looking at how successful the PRE has been and the people are really very awesome participants.

Next sat will be another PRE event I need to run, this time as chairperson. I will need tons of prayers as it is my first time holding a spiritual event!

So anyway, the AEC event was good, it was a good one and of course there are pointers to learn and take note of. I wish my AEC sales team best of luck in achieving their quota this quarter. This event is a definitive boost that they need for their sales achievement.

For now I got to go. Updates further in a bit. Good day!

~ Posted by MJ thru BlogPress by iPhone

Discernment for Love

Source: http://www.flickr.com/photos/love-chmy/3800147894/

It's not really a must to be with someone and to enter a relationship again. It's not mandatory for me to actually think of marriage, thus I'm not rushing into it. I just feel that marriage should really be kept as the 'one and only' phase of life. I always believe that there are that one made for each one, and that marriage will be what make it stronger. I can really see a huge difference now of how I see a relationship now than I see before. And as I see it, I understand why my past relationship that I thought would somehow, one way or another lead to the marriage, had to come to a halt. God is preparing me for something more, something He only know I will be needing.

Don't get me wrong, my ex-boyfriend, no matter how badly we ended, was a good friend, a good lover and a good husband to be, if so to say. However, there have been changes between us that occurred and thus it is where the incompatibility grew and thus the unhealthy defiling nature of human love emerges.The nature of our relationship, thinking back, actually proves to me that if it worked out till marriage, my relationship with God will not be established. And I was foolish because the relationship with God was the one thing that I should have known never to put second amongst other love. So I am thoroughly grateful how God allowed me to 'seek first the kingdom of God'.

Lately, my desire in finding the one is burning. But I'm putting it off, ignoring it, and dousing it with continuous establishment of keeping in mind healthy type of development of love, rather than seeking for the normal 'you like me, i like you, let's go on' kind of relationship. 

Serving in Church gives me the necessity to discern for the one. I've been practising discernment in guys since last year when I was dating Kenneth, my girl friend's guy friend. Where after discerning, God moves me to a 'NO' when I discern faithfully on Kenneth as it comes to the point of dating where I must decide whether to continue further or to stop seeing each other. So I listened to the 'whisper' I believe is God's, and later on in the months, understood why I was happy I ended it.

Then the next guy came, who had the marriage proposal which become the reason why we ended up being in a relationship. He is rich, son of a wealthy family, soft-spoken, spiritual, understanding, of age and we would have made it well, but after 4 months I had to empty myself of him because the discernment period gave me a feeble 'Yes'. So since that guy, I have not been seeing anyone.

I've a guy however, that God seems to be pointing to. BUT, yes a HUGE but is there. I don't think we're compatible. I have seek a extraordinary signs and each time I ask, it's a YES. So now I've stopped asking because I don't want to put Him in a test. Cos even if He points to him, I just don't know how it will all start, begin or even go forth. (Laughs)

I've taken a vow and have promised with my cell members as witnesses that I'm not going into a relationship without the thought of marriage. This is to avoid pre-marital relations, unhealthy mind-set and possession. I kinda, sorta know what I want but I guess it also seems still a bit too young for me that I want to look for a man to marry. Nevertheless, I guess I'd like to see my desires, and to discern for my vocation - if I want to consecrate myself to God or to marriage. I don't think it will be healthy for me to enter Blessed Singlehood as a lay person, so it's either I join the religious or to enter into marriage.

Oh well, I know within the months, I will have my answer. I'm excited actually!